I love my brother

Last night after youth.....I went into Scott's office and called my brother. I had asked him earlier in the day if he would hang out with me later in the night. So I called him and begged him for like 40 minutes to hang out with me. Don't ask me what gave me this huge desperate desire to hang out with my brother....but I really wanted to. So after much persuasion...I went home and Kev and I went out to Tim Horton's for "coffee"...lol. We had a great time. He and I get along really well and we can tell each other stuff that we don't tell everyone else. How thankful that I have Kevin for my brother. I am truly truly grateful and blessed. Like I actually LOVE to hang out with him and spend time with him. I wish that I could know how to be more of a godly role model to him. I wish I could get him to come to youth. Or even to floor hockey. Or to anything. I try not to be pressuring and forceful, but rather just put out a welcoming invitation. But he never accepts. This reminds me of a saying that I know....People won't care how much you know until they know how much you care. Perhaps all that is in my power right now is to show my brother how much I love him and care about him. Perhaps my love will be enough for him to see Christ in me. On top of that all I can really do is pray. Pray that he will see God. Oh how deeply I desire this for my brother. He is one of the most special people to me. So needless to say...I felt privileged to spend time with him last night. Happy times for me. I love my brother......tons and tons!

Tagged

7 Things I would like to do before I die:
1. Go surfing
2. Get married
3. Be a mom
4. Build a house
5. Travel
6. Move away from home
7. Own a king sized bed with the FlUfFiEsT pillows and duvet and featherbed mattress cover ever!

7 things I can’t do (yet) :
1. Play piano....I'm getting there though
2. Snowboard
3. Be friends with mice or bats (not now...not ever)
4. Cook....I will learn the skill eventually
5. Stay away from church....as of now I'm there at least four days a week...sometimes five
6. Speak sign language

7 things that attract me to blogging:
1. I've always enjoyed writing my thoughts over actually speaking them
2. I love keeping up with everyone's lives
3. Seeing pictures that people post
4. It's fun to be part of the blogger community
5. Getting comments left on my blog
6. Being kept up to date on what is all going on around me

7 things I say most often:
1. Shoot
2. Oh brother
3. "Hi, this is Kristan calling from Pharmasave on Pinehouse...just calling to let you know that your package from the Sears catalogue is in...and we're open 'til 10:00 so you can pick it up anytime you get a chance...thanks..bye"
4. What the heck
5. Alright
7. Here I go

7 books I love:
1. The Bible
2. K....I have waaaaaaay to many other books that I loved.....can't possibly decide on a few to write down
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.

7 movies I Like:
1. The Notebook
2. Cool Runnings
3. Sister Act 2
4. Diary of a Mad Black Woman
5. Sahara
6. Raise Your Voice
7. Elf

Finding peace

So I feel like a lot has been happening in my life in the last little while. Although it really isn't actually that much. I've been doing a lot of thinking about things, and contemplating my life and who I am, and I've come to a lot of real neat conclusions. I struggle a lot with wishing that people could really know me....really just understand me and all that I am. Because often I feel like I'm almost alone in my little world.....and oh how wonderful it would be if someone could just know me so completely....all of who I am....and just totally understand all of me and why I do what I do and say what I say....and absolutely love me on top of all that. I got to thinking about this, and I was struck with the thought..."Who even am I? Do I even know myself? Am I transparent with those around me....or do I hide....out of fear of being truly known?" These thoughts don't really even make that much sense to me....but somehow they are all there and all very real. In the last little while, I've been trying to figure out for myself who I am. Who I am when no one is around...who I am when I'm not worrying about what others think.....who I am if I don't constantly surround myself with people.....who I am in my Creator's eyes. I'm trying to learn how to become more of who I am rather than more of who I feel the people around me what me to be. I want to learn how to become more of me. Whoever it is that God created me to be...that's who I want to become. And if any people are going to love me.....they're going to love me for me.....just straight up Kristan Louise Perpeluk. I've been spending a lot more time at home spending time with myself. And I've been learning that I don't need to be out with people every single night in order to be aware that I am valued and loved. I'm learning to appreciate myself and everything that I am as a person. I guess I've been learning to quiet my life down....and create some peace within my heart. It's only been a few short weeks...and already my spirit feels much more full of peace and stillness than before. I guess that that's perhaps what I want for this new year....to become more of me and to really discover peace in my soul. God is so good to me....peace only comes through him....and I love what he does in my life when I allow him. I just love him.